From inside acid
📎 Event: EDC 2021
Time: 1am-2am, during Gryffin's DJ Set
Mental state: Two quarter-tabs of acid
Location: Sitting on the back bleachers
Notes: Typed with two cold thumbs on my phone into Google KeepSee the original Notion doc for Austin's comments: https://www.notion.so/akrolsmir/From-inside-acid-a574322a9de24a58ab35127e1880182c
To myself
45 percent different at most
Writing down noted for later is the equivalent of being able to do this in a lucid dream
Alsoutne experience of being able to type this I'd super cool. Don't thing I'm actually going much faster but I love feeling it...
Thinking about Alex and Ida as people who I need to explain this to afterwards, both for good and for bad (bad: record keepers. Good: people who care) - and so quickly. Evil villain to good guys immediately (5m)
Ego death...? At least remember thinking about traveling around for plowing
Normally I'd never try to narrate my experiences like this...
Take my hand in the middle of a crisis.
Definitely 40 percent different
And then the hunger... And the stimulation constantly stimulated
Glad I get to pass this around and keep it consistent
Other feelings: Quan is maybe not okay next to me? But he's thinking the same thing
Drunk rambling is super great
Why don't I do this more?
Feeling all these things which I'm going to forget immediately
I just died
But I'll be able to go back and read these
Have fun future self
Trying to simulate and stimulate self in the future in all the ways it means...
Definitely at a different state of consciousness
You'll never have to be alone... And that's all you need to know!!!
Why am I the kind of person to pull out my phone and start taking notes?
Other people... Do this dancing thing which I can no longer capture
Could capture more with video???
See the video with me and Quan
Time stamping now anyways. 0100 pretty cool
Feeling now grateful to have Quan next to me experiencing these together - tho earlier, wanted to be experiencing things on my own
Definitely won't hold on to this... But it has that same dream state that you would want to pull people into and turn into a cult
Am I experiencing this because of edc? Or acid? I mean my conscious self would have led thsi trek down meeting Quan and then coming here
Backwards like that fking novel look up later pool Ted Chiang not interstellar atrial arrival remember edelignt swlgiht dwlig deleting this moment
Probably nto tomorrow lol good luck
Quan is immeasurably wise for sitting up here instead of being in down there... Thanks Quan!
That was only 6 minutes? No way holy shit
Oh fuck it was
Love being able to take photos and stuff
Good luck with this next video
"I don't know if this is something other people do"
"but other people???"
Trying to keep this for myself in the future
I'm glad I'm experiencing all of this even if in the future I'll be regretting it a whole ton...
Still super hungry
Have fun future - not murderer - but friend Austin!
Still got a couple videos to keep this feeling alive in
What would I do if I were going to die now?
Oh
This is it
This story
Like literally
Tomorrow you're going to be dead
And no one is going to be able to tell
Except Austin
If Austin decides to post this...
Why would he?
Oh
Still trying to transmute the feeling right now unto a thin pipe of being writing understanding
Wish I had a laptop to type but that would be another excuse
I wonder who rzle E is trying to write under these conditions
But who CA es
Who cares
I'll do my thing
This is avou and when Quan fiuged out
Figures out that - dj set - gryffin - this super slow feeling
Holy shit
Glad I'm writing this down
Never going to be able to recapture it
Thunhgs go Ng back and forths
Slowing down
I wonder how pirole people outside are perceiving this
But who cares
Who cares
Except for the fact that I'm going to die like once this is all gone
I'm still writing this? Shit....
Losing the control of the scrub line - ability to scrub things back and forth fk this isn't really helping with write it down anyways
Okay now I'm on a trip
Okay m..
Huh... 1:15 for record
But yeah God luck good luck
Little bit more than 40 percent different than normal
But
Okay
Memory is so fleeting
Fk memory
Don't jbow
Don't know if trying to capture it is nay better
0118
Defuntiely feels like 20 minutes
Or maybe nothilu
Holy shit this si still ongoing
I'm glad I get to keep going for a little bit longer
My hands aren't colde
Cold
Even though I should be trying to
Record a kit
Record a lot more down
Fi
Fk
Who's even on
They're doing a great jog job of controlling my perceptions
No it's just me
119
Still going
Still alive
Hm really need it to take a piss and
My fingers
Are finally starting to feel something
Hmm
20
Was that really 1 minute?
Wow crazy
The amounts of time perceptions
And talking to future Austin
Guess I'm not dying
That I can condense into a few sections
And I can feel myself zh
Shivering a bitf
From needing to pee or cold or ecstasy
Glad I got to write that down
But
Really shivering now
122
And super hungry
Nice this will still be there
And my time bending powers
And complete inability to explain to anywonr
Anyone
Except for
This poor Austin
Shivering
Cold
Hobbled
By
Autocpwm
Autocomplete
Admit it you were hoping that wd going to happen
Bottle necked by data apaviktith
Capability
Throuput ivve thogt this before
But trying to keep it live
Hm
What a trip 123
Looking at it from outside I'd be crazy
Like 23 minutes
Wow I'm feeling the air now
Still super sensitive
Feeling great
Hmm
Will I want to read through this
Good thing ts
It's hard to delete
Picked up good medium
That way
For sure
Luck
Lucky me tight. Right? 125
Okau some of the physical effects are
Maybe I need to be the sober one
Or maybe not it's fine
Okay set it down by 145
Understand what Bill meant not even bill Mike Matt Mike!
WHT Mike meant about being gone
And then findable
In the next few minutes
Okay still 50
40 percent
20
Quan asked if I was cold
Ywah more than 40 percent a different person
Because ould 40 percent different Austin write this down?
And be hungry?
You know
127 good luck piecing this together
Not really feeling my fingertips
But Quan and I are both good here
128
Holy what
Only 28m
And I'm shivering and hungr
Huntgyr
Hungry
And dead
And feeling it all
Understand it all
Why people are asking for help
Am I cold?
Bvodoky
Nobody will remember this
Other than you Austin!
Quan is here tripping
And I guess this is my trip
Wondering if other people do the same thing
They must
We must access this all together
This state of consc
Conwciosunerss
Which I have to remember for later
Only 140
130
Glsd this music is still going
Glad for this lack of Autocomplete
For this lack of autocorewxt
Autocorewxt
Autocorrecy
Bow typing
Now typing autocorewxt is gojng to be
The thing
I want to remember
Nodding along
0131
Okay Unity
Glaf wrtr
Hitting
OH my good
God
That is so viol
Fk
12 minutes left (02 0133) until we get some care of some kind
Oh God this is so cool
Triply
Triply
Trippy
Fk Autocomplete
Helojng me forget things
Found my way back
Y
To Th is
This stream of consciousness
So much easier to udnesrating
Understand
Sorry not even recording
But well have the stories
0138
Time
The stories
And time to tell them
Feeling this is
Being conducted
Confu
Conjured
Hungry
Connected
To everyone
Fading away
Still probably another 6 minutes left
Until 145
Until check in to something safe time
Quan and I can pretend to be okay and understand each oehrr
Other
I'm actually enjoying
This a while lot more
Definitely recording that time
Fun puzzle got tmottow
For tomorrow
Got to take care of needs eventually
Cold
Piss
Sec
Sex
Light
142
Huh
Would it be possible to die now
By deleting this note
And it seems like it'd be a fun puzzle
But you're not
Gonna do it
For the stories
And the ability
To take a piss
.
145
4
3 more
2 more minutes
Gues iv
Spent the lady 43 total minutes
Int
On the life
On this page
Tomorrow I'll clean it up a bit
And ask)
KARTHIK
IF HR CAN HRLO ME
FIGURE OUT
HOW not to die and not stop shouting tm
Shouting at myself
Okay
1 minute
Until 145
And Quan us still
Having a food time
Good time
Me too
And this will be remembered
Shit
Arrival
Story for tomorrow
Tryng
To reconstruct
Wake up and not die
But evryin ej
Evtyinf
Is just enjoying
Feeling it
Okay
Too hard
Let's dance
145
Safecty
Safety check?
Dwwls a
Feels like the safety check to yorusefl
But now exterbalixef
Exterbalixef
External
Exterbalixef
Externalized
Slowing down time
Tying
Trying to make undelete able
I guess I could text someone right now
Like
Idk if I had internet
Who did you think?
Alex I Gues
This feeling is great
Dwfintley md
Don't thinkt
Taking my earbud
But expressing this to Quan
Wonder what he's feeling
Still cold and need to piss b
But also
About to die
Will anyone cqre?
Guess not
Going
To help yourself
Recotnrcigt
Recont
Rdcontstuckt
148
Feeling
Fking
Need to exotsd this
Exptss this
Express this
Defuntiely c
Recording
150
Rwconsteucoyng
Reconstructing
Through the lens
Guess I could try vocie
Having a good time
151
Holy shit that was a minute
Okay
I thought I got
Got it
But now I got it
Now I got it
Good luck future you
And also alive you.
Hungry need to piss
Feeling sensual
What the fic fuck
Okay
I'm going to say
145
152 ps
Past 145 need to pee, need to check on things
Time check
Wish I had some
Glaf
Glad I have skmew way
Still alive
154
Yhat wad was a promise to
Someone who no longer exists
Ego death makes
A lot o
More sense
Maybe
And tomorrowi
I'm going to remember
Trying to caputew this
Egi Sr
Ego still alive
A
It just paused
Who know d?
155
Okay
Need to promise
Someone
Why?
Ormosie
Promise who?
The layer ego
Ahhh I see
Well Journaling is indeed
Incredible
155
Still alive
Feeling things
Need to
Write things down and conceputlaixrf rehtoaicalixrf it like others
But I really do need to go soon
So
Vavjba
Back to gh
The storya
About someone
Who
Is trying
To remember this
Desperately
And I guess
Quan is watching out for me
The same way in watching out for him
It all makes senseth
The safety
I guess tomorrow I'm going to ask Quan if he remembers this
Are you going to r
Remember this tomorrow
Conci
Not gonna die yet
Understand it all
And can
Undrstsnf
The people next to me
158
Feeling it al ll
Alll
The secret cult of lsd
Huh
Can't kmaigne
Imagine I would write that down beforehand
So glad to beheare
Be
Here
Lucky future Austin
This should be pretty durable
Even if in cold
I'm not cold
I'm hungry m
And want to survive
Cult of lsf is
Part of this uninteresting
Story about this person who is going to die
Well probably not
Yello
Hey Austin!
HI!
I live you
Love you
Love you all
200 holy hell
It's 0200
Vanfiwth
Bandwit beyerrnd
Sensual r
Exp rurnces
Exvoetn
Straw
Trying to squeeze a really hidtiv expregince into a thin straw
Fun puzzle for Austin
AUSTIN!
HI!
DON'T WORRY!
THIS IS ALL
NOT GOING TO GET DELETED
Trying to capture this is overrated
Just od
Post this
Check with Karthikt
That's the inner filter
Am I still catholic?
Yes!
YeS
Yes!
This ain't going to get
Maybe it will
Checking on Quan
203
Incredibly cold and feeling it all
HIs
Still alive
Twitching a bit
Cuz I'm cold
Buts
Still alive
In control, I'd that
If that ever mattered
But this was great
Wrvef had this experience
Again
And again
204
Still alive
Unsafe but
Who cares
Ego deth
Seth
Death
Stull need to puss
Pisd
Piss
But also kinda afraid to move
Okay
Worked for Google
I am Austin - this is a super creepy story to be able to tell someone else
Still working on understanding the sense of time slip between being in the casino and your physical feelings